Gossip Girl
1. We know you like “the natural look.” However you don’t understand what “the natural look” actually is. The natural look is not a makeup-free face, it is applying makeup in a specific way and that may or may not be the style we want to rock that day. Makeup isn’t for you. Yes we love you and we want to look good for you, but mostly we want to do what makes us feel great.
2. We need more shelf and drawer space in the bathroom than you do. Sorry. You can have the garage.
3. Beauty is an art form. As François Nars argued, “Andy Warhol realized art could take any form. Putting on your makeup is a kind of self-portrait.”
4. The only reason we are ever late in getting ready by the time you want to leave is because we want to look our best for the evening. Keep in mind that our intentions are good and try to be patient. Or just tell us the event starts 20 minutes earlier than it actually does.
5. If you are buying something for us and it comes in pink, get it in pink.
6. Don’t ever tell us we’re “wasting” money on makeup or beauty products and we won’t tell you you’re “wasting” money on your hobbies. We’re not spending $30 on blush for your benefit, we know you can’t tell. Makeup is like our daily art project, just let us decide what tools we want.
7. Sometimes we do things that look painful (waxing, tweezing, etc) but we’re big girls, we can handle it — you don’t need to ask us why we’ll do something that hurts a little bit. Pain is beauty.
8. Girly girls tend to be more traditional than their less girly counterparts in other areas, too. If you’re wondering how to woo one, just think of the old classics: bring her flowers, compliment her, surprise her with a nice dinner — any little gesture that expresses your feelings. They will appreciate it and not think it’s cheesy like others might.
9. We’re totally fine with having separate interests. We aren’t the kind of girl who will feign interest in football or anything else that we aren’t naturally excited about and that’s totally okay. Go off and do your own thing, we’ll have more mystery in our relationship that way.
Mean Girls
10. Pro tip: if you want to have the best eye candy ever, give your girl a gift card to a lingerie store and let her go to town. It’s going to be expensive, but the results will be worth it.
11. You can have a low-maintenance girl or you can have one who looks great all the time. Pick one.
Toddlers and Tiaras
12. No relationship will ever compare to that of a girly girl and her favorite Sephora employee. Respect that friendship, it may end in a discount one day.
13. Don’t make fun of her for taking selfies. Sure, maybe it’s a little bit shallow and narcissistic, but it beats the hell out of low self-esteem and body shaming. If someone’s happy with the way they look, that’s a step in the right direction.
Girl Code
14. Never make fun of our “mascara face.” It’s not pretty, but it gets the job done.
15. Sometimes we wear shoes that hurt by the end of the night. Yes this is annoying. It’s also worth it to us or we wouldn’t keep doing it. Heels make you feel sexy and powerful and feminine at the same time. It’s intoxicating — who wouldn’t make this mistake?
16. It’s not that she gets dressed up to go to the gym. It’s just that she makes an extra effort to only own things that are cute so it happens naturally. And why wash off the makeup you’re already wearing just because some people think you shouldn’t wear it to the gym? Since when is that a reason to do something?
Legally Blonde
17. Being a girly girl doesn’t make a woman shallow. Come on. Dudes can appreciate art without being considered vapid but we try it infuse it into our every day lives and we’re ditzes? Nah.
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